"I'll Have What He's Having."

In the world of super-realistic Batman, if you get half your face melted off, you are endowed with the following amazing super powers:
  • A magic eyeball that is impervious to harm, even if every piece of flesh around it is burned beyond recognition.  You will no longer need to fear death because your eyeball will live on.
  • Immunity to infection that would kill any normal human being.
  • Be able to speak with your normal voice even though half your mouth and lips are scorched off.
  • The power of instant teleportation and being able to get to any part of a city in the blink of an impervious eye.
  • The ability to kill someone in a car crash while riding in the same car and, even though you enter the car with half an exposed face, and the other person just has (almost) broken legs, you will be the one who survives UNHARMED.
  • Be endowed with the ability to be the only one of a few people on Earth who not only shoots AT batman with an actual gun (versus using fists, sticks, pipes, and dogs), but actually hitting him with a bullet.
  • Be able to find anyone you’re looking for, anywhere, at any time, when you need to find them.

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40 Responses to “"I'll Have What He's Having."”

  1. The fact that they chose to make Two-Face’s non-face so ridiculously over-the-top makes me think that they didn’t have enough confidence in the script and/or the actor to make the tragic nature of his situation obvious to the viewer without makeup tricks, which is sad. A well-written and less deformed [more in line with the comics] Two-Face would’ve been a lot more interesting, instead of just being a gross-out technique.

  2. A nice mock site. But if The Dark Knight is so stupid and preposterous and the fans who love the film are parodied as stupid and sheep-like, then why go to all the trouble of making a WHOLE FUCKING WEBSITE dedicated to the very thing you think is substandard and below par? Especially if you think the very film and fans you mock are taking it too seriously? Hypocritical much?

    if ur any kind of jelous o brainwashed againts batman series , u dont have to let anyone read what goes on , on ur shitty mind..
    Heath ledger is on egreat actor , he’s not a gay cowboy , but i think ur a Stupid coward!
    if u can prove ur self go on and make something better than the dark knight , if u dont like Comic books and Batman! who forced U to watch thiis movie…
    U know , the reason u belive acting the role of a psycho is easy is only because ur a one great psycho ,Moron and Lunatic ur self…:)))))!!!!keeep bothering ur self , the movie is doing great with some worm like u!

  4. Why so emotional?

  5. Ugh, GEEE you might try punctuation, spelling and grammar. I look at that mess and think “I’m not going to wade through that to see if he has a point or not”

    You aren’t helping your case OR making fans of the movie look better here.

  6. These are really funny-really good insight on some of the holes in Two Face’s storyline.

    I really enjoyed the movie; I thought the writing and characterization were excellent, and I loved the plot, the Joker, and the funny bits (though there weren’t as many of those as I thought there would be).

    But the best part of seeing a movie you really liked is picking out the holes in the plot and characterization afterwards. Thanks for not being overly emotional about hating the movie and focusing more on actual issues with it.

  7. tdksucks, you’re missing the biggest flaw! Even if skin, when burned, melted away the way Dent’s did, how could the skin be perfectly “melted” away, but none of the muscle or other tissue from that side of his face? O.o It reminded me of Face Off, as if the fire peeled away his skin? When someone is burned the skin swells and is scarred. When they have even more severe burns, it burns away the muscle and fat too! Maybe in Gotham people have nonflammable eyes…and muscles, and apparently teeth, because he still had some pearly whites.

  8. the dark knight cult
    those star wars people


    we are devo

  9. Batman movies are not meant to be genuinely realistic. They can’t be: there is just no way that anyone in real life could pull off all that Batman and his enemies mange to pull off. Not to mention there is no such thing as memory cloth, grapple guns, Tumblers, and so on.

    But a Batman movie can have a realistic feel to it, especially as compared to the comedy series of the 60’s and the fantasy versions that preceded this movie. This movie is meant to have a realistic feel to it, not to be genuinely realistic in every respect. And I think it succeeds very well in this.

  10. “But a Batman movie can have a realistic feel to it, especially as compared to the comedy series of the 60’s and the fantasy versions that preceded this movie. This movie is meant to have a realistic feel to it, not to be genuinely realistic in every respect. And I think it succeeds very well in this.”

    Yes, most everyone realizes that there are many things inherent to the superhero premise that are unbelievable. Generally, however, there is some effort to EXPLAIN or SHOW how the crazy stuff happens, even if it is ridiculous.

    Example: Spider-Man has powers that no one in the real world has. That’s clearly not “realistic”.
    Solution: Spider-Man was bitten by a radioactive spider. Stupid? Kinda, but at least they made an effort.

    Example: Batman has gear that no one in the real world has.
    Solution: He is richer than God and has his own R&D branch in his company that deals in, among other things, military hardware.

    Example: Two Face, despite being a normal human, gets half of his face (but not eye) burned off and gains amazing abilities.
    Solution: The Nolan boys haven’t gotten back to us yet.

    There was no effort made to explain how Two Face can accomplish what was described in the article. And the last part of your statement is what makes this fact WORSE, not better. The fact that TDK wants to have its cake and eat it too by having “realism” like lengthy police jurisdiction arguments, ballistics analysis scenes, and discussions on the finer points of dog-proof armor while at the same time having two near-omniscient villains kind of irks me.

  11. Im not an expert on burns and such, but harvey was only running around for what? One or two days? aside from the fact that the wounds would have been cauterised by the heat, which would have prevented an infection, the short period of time two face was out of hospital for would not have allowed an infection to take hold and kill him (unless, you know, ebola is an issue in gotham). As for the car crash, dent was wearing a seatbelt. the mob guy wasn’t. the car crash wasn’t so much a crash as a flip. so maroni (i think that was his name) would have been killed because he was thrown around the place like a broken legged rag doll. dent would have been secured to his seat, and as a result, would have suffered some whiplash and maybe a few cuts and bruises. and before the whole “that could never happen” arguement starts, plenty of people survive car accidents because they’re wearing a seatbelt while other passengers die because they werent. And plenty of people have walked away from horrific car crashes relatively unscathed. Granted, its not incredibly common. But neither is it as impossible as you make it out to be. so kids, moral= wear seatbelts.

    as for the whole voice issue, i noticed no severe damage around dents neck. If the fire had been bad enough to damage his vocal chords, it would have killed him, no question. but the only damage was to his lips and cheek. That actually wouldnt be that much of an impediment. Stick two fingers in your mouth and on the left side of your face, use the fingers to peel your lips back so that the teeth are exposed. then say “The dark knight”. doesnt actually affect your speech greatly. sure, a few sylables might be slightly affected, but seeing as he still has the other half of his face left, his speech wouldn’t be all that greatly affected. the eye was i admit, kinda ridiculous. my only plausible answer is that, in treating the burns at the hospital, the medics removed Harvey’s eyelids because they had been severly damaged (similar to the way surgeons remove dead or damaged limbs/muscle/tissue to prevent an infection).

    the issue you raise about shooting batman is ridiculous. “Be endowed with the ability to be the only one of a few people on Earth who not only shoots AT batman with an actual gun (versus using fists, sticks, pipes, and dogs), but actually hitting him with a bullet.” um, plenty of guys shoot at batman. Plenty. eg. the mob guy who shoots at batman while unleashing the dogs, almost every mobster in the movie. The exceptions to that rule are people who like physical violence or are trained martial artists (Ra’s a gul and the joker being two examples, as ra’s is trained extensively and the joker like to be up close and personal, AS HE EXPLAINS IN A MONOLOGUE) And whats so weird about dent hitting batman?i mean, the guys are what? 5-6m apart? thats hardly a difficult shot, and harvey was aiming at batman for most of the time. whereas most crims are surprised by batman, and dont have a chance to aim properly.

    As for harvey finding people, he would have known about maroni’s hangouts as he was charging the guy, and therefore would have done alot of research in preparation for the case he was running. Also, he was an IA officer before he was DA. now, he makes remarks that people in Gordon’s unit are corrupt. IA would have investigated officers in the unit, and would have assessed their personal lives, including places they hung out in (obviously this could help determine factors which influence corruption). assuming that IA had files on these two, he could have just broken in (cops were no doubt busy with other events) stole those files and used that info. It’s not completely impossible (though a trite unlikely). The time he gets around in also isnt incredibly unlikely. If he has a car and knows the city streets, he could feasibly have gotten around the palce in the time depicted.

    Okay, the last paragraph is a tad unlikely, but aside from that, i think the explanations i present are feasible. But hey, you dont agree (im sure some wont) reply and tell me why.

  12. Omar Mirza,

    Memeory Cloth does actually exist. I’ve even seen it in a demonstration.

  13. Also Harvey’s face was covered in oil and it caught fire but was put out rapidly- he wasn’t caught in the explosion- therefor its not to hard to believe the flames burnt his skin, but weren’t hot or explosive enough to damage his muscle tissue, or even eye ball (which actually can handle quite a bit of heat before bursting, relatively. Look it up). He would’ve been in a crazy amount of pain and would certainyl have become infected within time.

    But the only `suspension of disbeliefe’ we’re really being asked to accept is that his grief at loosing Rachel and his pain at the realisation that he can not (as he always truly believed) `make his own luck’ was enough to drive him (temporarily?) insane, and too get him buy on adrenilin enough to shoot 5 people in the course of a day and a half. I can accept that.

    (think Rasputin for an example of extreme constiution in the face of mental delusion).

  14. Im sorry, but Since when does burning your lip affect your vocal chords found in your throat?

  15. Dent survives the crash because he puts on his seat belt a moment before he caps the driver!! While it is possible for his eye to be intact (when you have severe burns they often remove the dead/burnt flesh) it would dry out etc. in 2 minutes.

  16. you DO realise it’s just a movie, right? a fictional movie? if you’re going to whine about something you should make it something worthwhile.

    stop bitching.

  17. But brainwashed penguins with rockets on their backs are more realistic, right?

  18. “While it is possible for his eye to be intact (when you have severe burns they often remove the dead/burnt flesh) it would dry out etc. in 2 minutes.”

    He still has 1 functional eye left people…..

  19. Nolan said that they were going to go with a less exaggerated look for Harvey, but they were all too horrifying realistic. We’ve all seen burn victims in real life, either by acid or flames, and it’s terrifying. So they went a bit over the top with the eyelids and lips burnt off, and bone and muscle exposed so it wouldn’t be as “fucked up” as a real scar tissue would be.

  20. I do personally really like The Dark Knight and I can see why critics have touted as something a bit special. For one thing, it managed to interest people of all ages and people who had no real interest in the frnachise beforehand. Admittedly a lot of people could have gone to see purely because of the controversy surrounding it concerning a certain actor’s death. But a lot of people seemed to leave impressed.

    But I’m not here to go over every pro but I’ll address the points about Harvey Dent’s face. Yes, I do think perhaps it was a little overdone and illogical if Nolan did want to keep everything as realistic as possible. Obviously the character of Two-Face would need to have a certain degree of faithfulness to the standard image we see of him but it could have been toned down. Perhaps just severe burns on parts of one side of his face, particulary not on the eyelids for example. It would still put the point across of ‘Two-Face’ without being OTT. Having said that, I did like the design for his face in the film but on consideration it was a bit much for the Nolanverse.
    I was also a little confused about how he escaped Maroni’s car after such an epic crash. However, we don’t really know what happened to Maroni anyway [unless I really do have a bad memory] although I don’t imagine he’ll be dancing on the tables any time soon. Perhaps the crash was just a simple flip so it would provide the opportunity for Dent to escape unharmed. I’ll probably need to see the film again to see the crash again as I can’t remember how often it rolled etc. Unlike a lot of the ‘die hard’ fans of the film, I’ve only seen the film once at the cinema, mainly because I don’t shit money and I’d much rather wait til it comes onto DVD than sit in a cinema again with teenagers.
    The gunshot comment seemed a bit pointless since a lot of the people seem to be able to get good shots at Batman now. The dogs, random criminals, etc have all had a pop and have taken the air out of Batman’s lungs briefly. I can only imagine this is to add to the realistic element because the fact of the matter is it would have been impossible to be the strongest, fastest, most athletic. Also Dent was very far from Batman and they were having an exchange of words rather than the normal fight situation we would see Batman in.

    I understand this film didn’t appeal to you, but I can assure you that although it may have not reached the standards you were hoping for, all these critics wouldn’t have just praised this film for shits and giggles. Film lovers will know more than any other that critics will rip holes in most things.
    In making this site, you are just propelling this film further into the limelight. It’s provoking irritating fangirls and fanbois to flaunt their lack of grammar and spelling in your face even further, thus poisoning you against the film and its fans to a greater extent. Surely it was just better to save your rants for your friends and just ignore the presence of the film. But there’s no stopping you now so I’ll try to reply to your posts as reasonably as I can to prove there are normal fans out there with a grasp of the English language.

  21. Lol did Jimmyboy actually try to rationalize one of the dumbest plot wholes concocted by saying the guys burns were cauterized? Have you ever been to a burn ward? Do you realize how dangerous it would be for someone with 5th degree burns to be running around like that (Not that they would because they would be in extreme agony, they would be begging to die instead.)? They would without any question be dead within hours without treatment. Fanboys are fucking stupid.

    And if you insecure twats don’t like what the site creator has to say DON’T FUCKING COME TO THIS SITE!!!

  22. A bit of information on exposed eyeballs (reason why it’s ridiculous if the Nolan’s want it “realistic” for Two-Face):

    There’s no way Dent’s eye can function as long as it did without an eyelid. I loved the way it looked in the comics (since anything goes in that medium, and something which the Nolan’s might have been referencing) but it is not a physical possibility.

    The eye needs to be gelled, gauzed and covered with a plastic patch so it does not dry out. Do not even start the “it was only x amount of time” argument. Try a little experiment: keep your eyes open as long as you can without blinking.

    I hate to admit it, but I liked the movie. The little comic book geek girl within went “SQUEE!” too many times for me not to. I don’t care what the Nolan’s wanted it to be.

  23. @ ctcentralinfo,

    “They would without any question be dead within hours without treatment”

    Gordon states that Harvey is refusing skin grafts. Doctors wouldn’t start to consider skin grafts unless they’d already operated to remove the dead tissue and patched him up as best they could. They wouldn’t operate and just say “well, lets leave him so that if he refuses skin grafts, he’ll die”. They’d leave him in a state where he could function and LIVE even if he refused the skin grafts. Which he did.

    “Not that they would because they would be in extreme agony, they would be begging to die instead.”

    He just lost the love of his life in an extremey traumatic nature and was himself horribly scared. gordon said he was in extreme agony.
    the movie isn’t saying hes not in pain. He’s just more motivated by adrenalin, grief and a desire for revenge (not to mention temporary insanity) to an extent where he can function through the pain. Heck, the pain probably provides him with even greater desire for revenge. And judging by his willingness to kill himself on the flip of a coin he has something of a death wish anyway. so in his own way he kind of is begging to die. Certainly he doesn’t really care about himself anymore.

    “And if you insecure tw@ts don’t like what the site creator has to say DON’T F***ING COME TO THIS SITE!!!

    Free speech, bud. I’m quite sure that the site creator knew this site would inspire debate. If he didn’t want there to be debate on this site, he would just delete our comments. He hasn’t. And if you read around the site its been used for debate for a while. You don’t like it? Tough sh*t.

    Oh, and fanboys aren’t “f***ing stupid”, as you so eloquently put it. We just happen to be capable of forming logical arguements which ignorant gorillas like you can’t understand. Deal with it.

    Long Live The Dark Knight

  24. Stop crying Jimmyboy.

    The Dark Knight sucks and you can’t change that/

  25. lol at greensucksbluerules.

    You can always count on somebody to come along and discredit another person’s argument without providing any of their own besides “The Dark Knight sucks and you can’t change that!”. It must be that high tdk-hater IQ at work.

  26. -paz

    Even if 1 eyeball was ‘dead’, his other eyeball was still there and there is only, what a 35% loss in horizontal range of vision if you loose one eye. meaning: he could still see quite clearly if he moved his head around enough.

    He didn’t suffer ‘5th degree’ burns as your oh so scientifically accurate post described. Batman managed to put out the fire on the half of his face quite quickly. And please don’t rant about the ‘fanboys’ having low intelligence. Your post’s grammar, punctuation, sentence structure and spelling was enough for all of us to figure out your IQ level.

  27. twiceurbrain

    I did not say the eye was dead. It can be kept alive easily with the treatment (and I’m sure there are many others) I stated. Also, I know he still could have seen quite clearly. I did not make any comment on his loss of vision entirely.

    You are correct about only losing a bit of his field of view if he lost that eye. It would take him a while longer to regain his sense of depth perception. When I had corneal ulcers I cannot count how many times I ran into people/objects. XD

    The cat was not as forgiving as some of the other living beings were.

  28. i think what Nolan was going for in this direction for Harvey Dent was attempting to make realistic a very unrealistic character. in my opinion, Two-Face is the second best Batman villain, but trying to make him plausible in a movie that is trying to be realistic is just implausible. in previous Batman films, or on TV shows, Two-Face has literally had a normal face, a line, and then the screwed up second half. i think what Nolan was going for was a more realistic-LOOKING Two-Face, not necessarily a realistic-LASTING Two-Face. because in real life, if half of your face got messed up, there wouldn’t be a clear cut line going down your body

  29. guys, this is the best blog i’ve come across in 2008.

  30. Jac is just mad that he couldn’t get it on with Heath Ledger before he died.

  31. Stop crying greensucksbluerules.

    You suck and you can’t change that.

  32. greensucksbluerules

    Thank you for your immature comment, you just proved my point for me.

  33. Hey ahem, nice job stealing my line and fucking up Jac.

    Also Ledger deserved it.

  34. ahem – Butthurt fanboy is butthurt. Oh and nice job stealing my line.

    Jac – Thank you for taking the internet seriously, you just proved my point for me.

  35. ahem – Nice job stealing my line. You’re just upset that you fail at life.

    Jac – Thank you for taking the internet seriously, you just proved my point for me.

  36. greensucksbluerules- Nice job demonstrating that you have the intelligence of a park bench. You’re just upset that you fail at replies. Thank you for amusing us, you just proved you’re a git.

  37. Jimmyboy sures loves getting owned.

  38. Stop crying greensucksbluerules. You’re an immature tosspot who fails at life and nothing can change that.

  39. If I failed so much at replies, you wouldn’t be constantly stealing them.

    You lose, good day sir.

  40. Jeez its a comic hero movie so give them a break. There’s going to be a little unrealistic things in this movie, but isnt there in every comic book movie. Your basically saying that all comic book movies are terrible. give them a break!

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